ilona the pest

insecurity + narcissism = awesome!

Monday, May 28, 2007

bridesmaid report

i was in a wedding this weekend. my first time as a bridesmaid*! quite thrilling. i felt very special, getting to be involved in all the action, instead of just sitting out there with the masses.

i got to have my hair professionally styled in a glamorous curl-y updo -- about 50 bobby pins and enough hairspray to make the curls in the back feel like hard plastic:

the dresses were not horrible, the weather was good, the events (especially the softball game!) were all fun, the flower children were adorable, and the happy couple are perfect for each other. a wonderful time was had by all.

*because i've been watching The Tudors every week, i had a revelation that bridesmaids really are holdovers from the monarchical tradition of ladies-in-waiting -- the queen for the day being waited upon by her peers. interesting, no?


  • At 8:40 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


  • At 6:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


    I haven't posted here for a while. Sorry about that.

    But this latest pic of you has got my head swimming.

    Do you see yourself getting married, and having kids? (This is a serious question.) I can't stop thinking about you.

    Hugs & Kisses,

    The Love Bandit (no, I never really went away.....)

  • At 8:16 AM, Blogger ilona said…

    Do you see yourself getting married, and having kids?

    dear love bandit,

    yes, definitely. but unfortunately for you, they are going to be tall, curly-haired, nearsighted jewish kids. i'm off the market, boys! :)

    yours truly,

  • At 8:29 AM, Blogger wt said…

    Congrats on being back off the market!

    The Love Bandit loses again. Banditry doesn't pay.

  • At 8:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said… are still in the running towards becoming america's next top model.

  • At 5:59 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hi sweetie.

    Your response has broken my heart. I so desperately would like to take you to bed and "love you longtime".

    You say you're "off the market". Are you formally engaged? If not, then you are most definitely NOT "off the market".

    Hugs & kisses,

    The Loev Bandit

  • At 9:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Ilona, how are turnip and beta manlet? Do they meow a lot?


    Beta manlet

  • At 12:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hi Ilona,
    Did you catch the bouquet? Did you even try or did you avoid it like it was a drug-resistant tuberculosis?

    PS- You look very nice showing your milky white back. ;)


  • At 10:00 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

    wow, what a good picture. did i take it? much of that night is something of a blur. but in a totally good way.

  • At 7:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Will these tall Jewish children be prematurely bald as well (at least the male ones)? I'm trying to narrow the field of suspects.

  • At 6:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    you look like my cousin who is also a jew doesnt eat bacon though.

    p.s. shes a right cow hope your not


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