ilona the pest

insecurity + narcissism = awesome!

Thursday, June 25, 2009


i may or may not have a small problem with eating, body image, etc. brought on most recently by this damn wedding.

i used to be super skinny as a kid and over the years i've become more like regular thin. i haven't quite gotten used to that yet. the slight roundness & softness showing up in new places on my body seems foreign and out of place.

trying to do any kind of a diet is inherently a bad idea for a detail-oriented control freak like me. it's way too easy for me to slip into an unhealthily obsessed frame of mind about it without intending to.

i have to remind myself: this is the shape my body wants to be. we don't stay the same forever. i am awesome & hot & worth a lot more than setting records for skinniness. and my life is pretty miserable when i'm depriving myself of all the delicious foods that i love. it's definitely not worth it.


  • At 9:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Post a recent pics of this supposed softening...we'd love to see it. ;-)
    Women are such narcissists. You're cute regardless, don't sweat it!

  • At 9:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    These things come with engagements. it is a package, so to say.

    But you are pretty and smart so p** would be a fool to even notice that.

  • At 2:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    congrats on getting married, you were a beautiful bride, even though that's pretty shallow and whatever. you were.

  • At 10:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm sure you look great. You live in SF. Walk up the hills if you don't agree with me. Remember, anorexia is a disease of the privileged. People in poor countries don't worry about such things. Use the energy devoted to worrying about this for positive purposes like helping other people.


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